Former Hawthorn player and Collingwood runner Alex Woodward has opened up on just how dark things got after the 2018 Grand Final, a game the Pies lost by less than a goal.
Normally a runner wouldn't feel the pain of a tight loss so intensely but Woodward was involved in an incident that some see as game-defining.
In the third quarter, Woodward collided with Jaidyn Stephenson as he attempted to mark a ball kicked by Brayden Maynard. The ball landed in the hands of Elliot Yeo who went back and kicked a massive goal in the context of the game.
It is debatable whether Stephenson was ever going to get to the ball and make a contest, but that didn't stop the incident from being spoken about in the fallout of the game.
Speaking on theย Real Talk With Benoย podcast, Woodward spoke about the vile messages he received from "fans" asking him to end his own life.
"At the time as an AFL community, we were probably a little bit foreign to pointing things out on social media, Woodward said.
"I'm really happy and grateful it gets pointed out now, particularly the racial stuff. At the time I felt like I was fighting my own battles a bit with that.
"At that time I was a bloke who had gone through four knee recos and witnessed the Bourke Street attacks. That moment and the backlash was really challenging."
Woodward revealed that he had isolated himself from the world after the Grand Final in a bid to avoid the constant talk around his involvement in the game.
"I had to get every bit of my mental strength to ignore it, but I was pretty open to speaking to some of them," Woodward said.
"I basically shut off to the world for a week, just stayed inside, turned my social media off and my phone off and just needed to absorb it because obviously, it's going to take a while."
Woodward who played two games for the Hawks, said that the messages he received got as dark as some fans asking him to kill himself. He said that it was hard to take given that these people didn't know him at all.
"I faced the backlash and a lot of it wasn't necessary and crossed the line," Woodward told the Real Talk With Beno podcast.
"They're the ones that challenged me as a person. I just questioned some of them because they didn't know me at all. You're asking me to end my life for that moment and it's just a little bit hard to make the connection there.
"Because they are actually spitting venom and genuine hate towards me without really knowing me. If I was to show an example of some of the worst stuff, I'd like to think those people regret sending that stuff."
Woodward replied to some of the people messaging him, but rather than fight back, he decided to question them and "kill them with kindness".
"I was never fighting back because that's what they want," he said.
"A lot of my responses were pretty short and sharp. 'Sorry you feel that way, I can't really change the moment now. So, sorry you feel that way but I think what you're saying is pretty unnecessary.' I think it's pretty important they look themselves in the mirror after they do that."
Speaking about the incident itself, Woodward said he was happy to speak about it as it is just one of those things that happens.
He said that he picked a direction to run when he saw the footy coming and that it was just bad luck that saw him collide with Stephenson.
"To be honest, I was just doing my job on that side of the field," Woodward said.
"I had a message to give and thought I was in a position where I could deliver that. I thought I was in a pretty safe spot where I didn't think the footy would come. That's what you're taught as a runner, to get out of the way.
"I had to deliver a message out that side and I was doing that, next minute I look up and this footy is literally coming straight at me. We (runners) are taught to just run in a certain direction and just commit to it.
"So I just started running to the pocket, unfortunately (I) crossed paths with Jaidyn and I knew regardless of the skill I was in the way. (But) sometimes you can't avoid these things as well."
Woodward said that while fans tended not to have much sympathy for him, he was well supported by the players and by coach Nathan Buckley.
"Bucks got around me and the players did as well," he said.
"I'm forever grateful for the support."
