Richmond champion Trent Cotchin doesn't sit easily with the tag as an AFL Brownlow medallist.
In 2012, Cotchin was awarded with the honour after Essendon's Jobe Watson was stripped of the accolade, following the Essendon supplements saga.
Watson was the best player throughout the season and it showed as he stormed to 30 votes on the AFL's night of nights, four ahead of both the former Tigers skipper and Hawthorn midfielder Sam Mitchell.
Cotchin and Mitchell were retrospectively bestowed the 2012 Brownlow Medal after the Bombers son-of-a-gun was stripped of his medal due to his ineligibility following the suspension, in November 2016.
However, nearly a dozen years after being placed in the game's history along with some of the most recognisable names in the sport, Cotchin - who retired at the end of last season - still feels uneasy about holding the medal to this date.
Speaking on The Howie Games with host and sports presenter Mark Howard, the three-time premiership captain weighed in on feeling "uncomfortable" holding the game's highest individual honour.
"I tried to contact Jobe when it all unfolded," Cotchin said.
"It wasn't something that I really wanted for, to be completely honest. I still sit there, and you saying that, makes me feel uncomfortable.
"I always reference (myself) as a token Brownlow medallist.
"I don't know whether that's me struggling to accept what's happened. Having known a few other Essendon players that were a part of that (ban) at the time, and I know you make decisions, and you need to live by those decisions, but it was a bloody tough time for that footy club, and the players that were involved in it.
"I have an appreciation for what the players went through, and also have admiration for the player that Jobe was, particularly that year (2012)."
Despite Cotchin's feeling of discomfort, in 2012, he was awarded the AFLCA Champion Player of the Year award, whereby coaching panels handed down votes after every game.
All-Australian selectors also recognised his efforts as worthy of a blazer while the Tigers saw him as the best player at the club, handing him his second Jack Dyer Medal.
