Adelaide Crows captain Taylor Walker reveals that he suffered from an anxious meltdown during his appearance in the 2017 AFL Grand Final.
Walker said his biggest mistake leading to the Crows' 48-point loss to Richmond in the season finale was that he bottled up his thoughts and emotions, leading to an uneasy feeling when he set foot on the MCG.
"I was super-anxious before the game and I didn't speak about my feelings or emotions," Walker told consultancy firm AltoPEOPLE.
"I couldn't think clearly ... I still feel the weight of that."
The Crows captain said his leadership skills and responsibilities suffered on the day as well, suggesting that he had trouble prioritising between his individual needs and his team needs.
"As a captain, you need to perform as a senior player ... I was too caught up in what I needed to do individually rather than what the group needed from me," Walker added.
"But you also need to have a broader understanding of what's happening on the ground - the tactical stuff as well as the technical, what do we need to do as a group."
The 27-year-old said that the process was a "huge learning experience", admitting that if his team were to have the opportunity again, he'd treat his thoughts differently.
"If I get the chance again, and I hope we do this year, I'd prepare myself better," Walker told AltoPEOPLE.
He said the biggest difference in preparation he'd make would be to be more open and vulnerable with his teammates in the lead up to the big event.
"This year I'd be more inclined to say to the boys, 'Look, I'm sh***ing myself too. It's OK' ... a big thing for me now is being more vulnerable in front of the group, showing more emotion."
Walker told AltoPEOPLE that his team sat down after their Grand Final loss and discussed their emotions and where they went wrong in regards to personal preparation. He explains that the team has moved on, but glad they were able to find some answers.
"The team that played in the Grand Final sat around afterwards and we spoke about everything, which was good," Walker said.
"We have jumped a hurdle because of that and now we can move on with clarity."